Jealous Lies/Maybe Lost
by LaceyKoi
Summary: don't kill me...don't kill me...don't kill me...double titles attributed, respectively, to mel & Morningstar! (why can't i do titles?)


I promised myself I'd never do it. But I did. Just like I said I'd never kill one of the pretty boys, but I did. What am I talking about? *shrug*  
  
  
  
Duo awoke tied to a chair. He felt the familiar dryness of his mouth from being drugged. He sensed the blinding black eyeshade. The friendly embrace of air on naked skin. He gently shook his head and felt the gentle spill of his own chestnut locks around him.  
  
Duo smiled. He absolutely loved it when Heero tied him up.  
  
A slap across his face erased his smile. A familiar female voice made him tremble helplessly.  
  
"What are you smiling about, bitch?!"  
  
Relena. Shinigami, not Relena.  
  
"I asked you a question, bitch!"  
  
The eyeshade was brutally torn away, allowing Duo to read the rage in Relena's eyes. He tried to get as far away from her as possible, but he was still tightly tied to the wooden chair.  
  
"Why?" Duo could barely whisper the question through his parched lips, but the temporarily pacified Relena heard through the silence.  
  
"Why? You _dare_ ask _why_ I did this to you, you little whore? Damn it, if I'm always able to follow Heero, don't you think I have eyes on him all the time?" At Duo's gasp, she continued, even more loudly. "That's right, I know all about those depraved acts! You--you--you used your gilded tongue to seduce him! You stained Heero's soul! Fucking bastard!" She slapped Duo again, watching his face. She didn't really love Heero. She just thought they fit together. He destroyed things and had to live with the consequences. She tried to keep things from being destroyed, then just moved on to the next thing that needed saving. "No more. No more! Do you get that, you slut? Leave Heero Yuy the hell alone!"  
  
All Duo could do was shake his head.  
  
"No?" A smile that almost tore Duo's heart out of his chest and brought tears to his eyes graced her face as a silver flash ran through the air. Scissors appeared in Relena's hand. "I _said_, leave Heero Yuy alone!"  
  
Duo licked his lips slowly. Then he swallowed hard. Staring up into Relena's stone cold eyes, Duo shook his head. "No. Heero…"  
  
"Is _mine_. As if he could ever love someone like you! I command you, as Queen of the World, to leave him alone!"  
  
"No."  
  
"Fine." She brandished the scissors. "Last chance."  
  
With steady eyes and a steady voice, Duo looked at her and told her a simple truth. "I love him. No."  
  
Relena's features hardened. "I gave you _so_ many chances to walk away from this without getting hurt. Now, it's _over_." She grasped a handful of Duo's long hair, roughly pulling it to herself. She made sure Duo's eyes were on her as she held the scissors to his thick hair.  
  
Violet eyes slid shut as shiny silver scissors closed around Duo's hair. When the cold metallic blades left his hair, Duo reopened his eyes. He read the restatement of the question in Relena's cold eyes, and shook his head in a negative response. She used the silver blades to liberate another handful of Duo's hair each time he refused to leave Heero alone, until all the hair that was left on Duo's head was cut in uneven chunks.  
  
Relena held a mirror up to Duo's face with glee in her eyes. When he looked into the reflective surface, the first thing he saw were his own distressed violets. Then his eyes focused on the rest of the image. When he saw the shortened chestnut strands, crystalline tear wells formed. As a salty clean tear streaked it's way through the dirt on his cheek, a soft moan and a whispered plea escaped his lips. "Heero…where are you?"  
  
Rage lined Relena's visage. "After this…after you've lost something that mattered to you as much as your hair, you _still_ think Heero is going to come for you?" She laughed, bitter, desperate. "You are sadly mistaken, poor boy." She leaned over him so they were nose to nose. "Sadly mistaken." When Duo didn't respond, she looked down, seeing his cross. She snatched it off his neck, not even bothering to open the clasp. "You think this will save you?" She scoffed, laughing harshly. Her face twisted as she crushed the cross in her bare hand. She tossed it over her shoulder before reaching out and wiping the blood freed by the edges on Duo's bare skin.  
  
"He never loved you, either."  
  
Following Relena's declaration, the wall of the small room they were sitting in exploded. As Relena cowered, Duo lifted his tear streaked face.  
  
Before the dense combination of smoke and dust cleared, a single bullet pierced through everything, only stopping when a clean hole appeared between Relena's eyes.  
  
Heero fell to his knees before Duo's form. "Duo…" Heero inhaled softly as he locked his fingers in the shortened hair. He tilted Duo's face up to meet his but stopped when Duo pulled away.  
  
"No…don't--don't…DON'T LOOK AT ME!"  
  
Instead of trying to restrain him when he began fighting the bonds, Heero swiftly cut the restraints. Duo pulled away from Heero roughly, falling over himself.  
  
Heero reached his had to his Duo…only to find it batted away. When he tried to look at well-loved eyes, Duo wouldn't even glance at him. He couldn't look at Duo, and he couldn't touch him. So he just stood there, trying to speak.  
  
"Duo…"  
  
Then the soft answer. "Go away. Just go away and leave me alone."  
  
"Duo…"  
  
"I said to leave me alone! No one can _ever_ see me like this! Get away!"  
  
Heero reached out to stop Duo's hand, flailing blindly to keep his own away. He captured the other as Duo lifted an angry, tear-streaked face. Duo dropped out of consciousness upon seeing the prostrate figure beyond, stained red above the pink.  
  
When Duo woke, he was restrained on a bed. He opened his bloodshot eyes and began struggling.  
  
A broken voice brought him back to his body.  
  
"Stop…please stop…"  
  
Heero. With…tears in his voice?  
  
"Hee…"  
  
"Duo?!" Things falling. Heero's face. A strong hand touching Duo's own face. A tear escaped Duo's eye.  
  
"Leave me alone."  
  
The next time Duo woke he was no longer restrained to the bed, but his head felt light…so very light.  
  
A shaky, pale hand went to his hair, but it wasn't what he thought. His hair was braided.  
  
Not his long traditional braid, but tiny braids all over his head.  
  
Duo ran his hand through his tiny braids as his frame shook with sobs. When his eyes were red, raw, and dry, they fell upon a note.  
  
"Duo--  
  
I'm sorry you had to wake up tied to a bed, but you were fighting in your sleep. I would reach out to calm you, but if I got within a yard of you, you would scream 'go away' and start crying. When you woke up and told me to leave you alone, I realized you were talking to _me_, not some nightmare monster. So I left you alone. Remember though, that I'm never too far away. I love you.  
  
--Heero"  
  
Duo stared at the note before shaking his head and snorting.  
  
"Yeah, right." The note was torn to pieces and dropped to the floor by Duo's own hand (á la Two Gentlemen of Verona). The room was left in silence.  
  
Upon leaving the room, Duo immediately encountered Wufei.  
  
"Maxwell, you look like shit."  
  
"Yeah, tell me about it. I don't know who did this to my hair, but--"  
  
"Your hair? I was talking about your eyes. They're red. Yuy told me you'd been crying when he asked me to take care of you, so I brought you these." Wufei handed Duo a bottle of eye drops. "And I think Yuy did a wonderful job on your hair. Where the hell did he learn to do such detailed braids?"  
  
Duo blushed pink.  
  
"I don't know. But hey, have you seen--?"  
  
"This?"  
  
"My cap! How did you know? How did you find it? How--"  
  
"Maxwell. I'm sorry to say I hid it after your last practical joke on me. I apologize."  
  
Duo pulled his cap on, frowning as he noticed it now hid most of his hair.  
  
"Don't worry about it, Wu-chan. And you said Heero did my hair?"  
  
Wufei nodded to the affirmative.  
  
"I'll take that up with him later. Kitchen easy to find?"  
  
Another nod.  
  
" 'Kay! See you later!"  
  
Wufei's eyes followed as Duo left him standing alone.  
  
/Duo himself seems different. I don't believe Yuy's story about 'deranged barbers.' Oh, well, I'll ask later…/  
  
/I miss his braid./  
  
Duo arrived in the kitchen to find Heero with his head down, and a handful of Duo's shorn hair tied with a ribbon in his fist.  
  
Utilizing all his skills to remain silent, Duo began gathering food stuffs, not realizing that Heero was sleeping.  
  
"Duo…why do you hate me?"  
  
Duo jumped around, shocked at being caught but prepared to answer, when he saw that Heero's eyes were closed.  
  
Shaking his head at how easily startled he was, Duo crossed the kitchen to kneel beside Heero's head and whisper a reply.  
  
"I don't hate you…but you don't love me, either."  
  
Saying this, the formerly braided pilot dropped a kiss on Heero's forehead before escaping without his food.  
  
" 'I don't hate you…but you don't love me, either.' "  
  
Rewind.  
  
" 'I don't hate you…but you don't love me, either.' "  
  
Rewind.  
  
" 'I don't hate you…but you don't love me, either.' "  
  
Rewind.  
  
" '--you don't love me--"  
  
Stop.  
  
/He thinks I don't love him. Why would he think I don't love him. Relena. K'so! I should have killed her before. But no, I wait till she's kidnapped my boyfriend and tried to make him get out of my life. She _must_ have said it. And he believed it./  
  
"BITCH!"  
  
/ He hates me. He loathes me. He hates me. He loathes me. He hates me. He loathes me. He hates me. He loathes me. He loathes me. Relena was right. He never loved me./  
  
"Duo?" Instead of turning around with a sultry smile as he used to, Duo remained with his back to the door.  
  
"Nani, Yuy?" Heero walked around and sat in front of Duo.  
  
"What happened with Relena? What did she say?"  
  
"The truth! You don't love me--and you probably never did."  
  
"Duo, I've _always_ loved you. Now tell me what happened."  
  
"She tied me up. She cut my hair. She took my cross. She said you don't love me. And then you…and she…and she was right and I had only been lying to myself!"  
  
"Duo…" Heero pulled him into an embrace.  
  
"Let go."  
  
"Iie. Ai shiteru, tenshi."  
  
"Yeah? Well, I _hate_ you because you lie."  
  
"I never lie. To you anyway. And everything I've said to you is to keep you from leaving. Everything I've done is so you won't hate me. _Relena_ lies. She's been after me forever and," Heero took Duo's hand and leaned his head against Duo, "she knows you're more beautiful. You're the only one I want. Don't hate me, because I'm lost without you."  
  
"_Are_ you lost?"  
  
"With you? Never. You are home, and I'm never lost if I can find home."  
  
"You never loved me."  
  
"Never and always are awfully close. I always loved you Duo."  
  
"But you'll never love me again without my hair."  
  
"You still have hair."  
  
"But you loved the length."  
  
"I loved the fact that it was yours."  
  
"I loved the fact that Relena was only after _you_, and she never got you."  
  
"She's gone! She can no more get me dead than she could alive! Only you can get me!"  
  
"What if I don't _want_ you?!?!"  
  
"Then nobody gets me!"  
  
"But what if I want you?"  
  
"Then nobody _else_ gets me!"  
  
"I want you! But I lost my _hair_ for you, Heero!"  
  
"It's material. Relena's love for me was material."  
  
"What's mine then?"  
  
"Spiritually cleansing. So I guess spiritual. You make me feel good."  
  
"My _hair_ made you feel good."  
  
"DUO! _YOU_ make me feel good! Forget your hair, it's gone, I'm sorry, but Duo…you're the one that makes me feel good _here_." Heero laid a hand against his heart.  
  
Duo reached up to fiddle with one of his braids. Heero reached out and took his hat. Duo grabbed it back.  
  
"You _killed_ my hair, Heero. No one can ever see me like this."  
  
Smile. Heero smiled with _teeth_. "Come on, baka. I'll get them out."  
  
  
  
In case you were wondering, I said I'd never mess with Duo's hair, but I've done that twice now… 


End file.
